By Steve Beckow, June 10, 2022
(Golden Age of Gaia)
This is an entry in my Ascension ethnography.
Jesus said:
“Where you have need to turn, my brothers and sisters, is inward, deep to the core of your being. I do not speak of the personality that is present in this lifetime but rather of the soul essence, the full design that has been activated within you.”
I need encouragement because going inward in a time of external chaos and mayhem feels counter-intuitive.
And yet we’re here to anchor the light, are we not? And anchoring the light involves internal operations, rather than external.
I can’t speak to “anchoring the light.” That’s a matter for a spiritual teacher and I’m a writer, not a spiritual teacher.
I value solitude. I value silence. I value going inward. Spiritual teachers address crowds and talk to people day in and day out. That’s definitely not me.
Going inward can be just for a moment. One slow and deep breath. But it seldom is.
I notice that, having valued silence and solitude for so long, I now definitely seek it out and continually return to it. Others like to play loud music. Some have to have a radio on. To each his own with love and tolerance.
But I watch myself every day, doing everything I can to make my space silent and still.
I’ve now committed to the divine qualities and still refuse to fully embrace the fact that I’m by temperament a monk. If I’m committed to the divine qualities, they tend towards stillness and silence anyways, among other qualities (joy, bliss, love, etc.).
It can’t be an accident that one week I commit to the qualities and a week or two later I am magnetically attracted towards stillness and silence. SaLuSa tells us:
“There are no accidents or coincidences. Every occurrence and every opportunity that you experience during Earth life has been prepared or allowed for before you incarnated.” (2)
Why pretend that I’m sociable when I no longer am? I used to come to office parties, stay for ten minutes, and then sneak out the back door. I just wanted to get home and be back in quietude.
All the bliss that others get from social interaction, I get directly from my heart when I water it with stillness and feed it with silence.
The longing for liberation is strong. (3)
I am not sociable. And I’m progressively getting less so. To turn my back on it would be like injuring myself. Just as I committed to the divine qualities, I now commit to the quiet life.
Granted that “full” enlightenment would nullify my soul contract, and so is not an option I choose any more than my guides do, I’m still driven to push my edge as far as is allowable. Give me as much as my contract permits, for the highest good of all.
***
Now a new puzzle, a new paradox arises. Previously I was fully committed to my publishing. But the minute I start to allow myself to move further toward a life of meditation and stillness, I say to myself that I’ll have to take a break from publishing so many books.
The Mother was right. (4) I tend to let go of my service contract when I go more deeply into meditation and other solitary pursuits. Hmmm….
Ahhh, but here is where my study comes to my aid: Through study I know that there are no accidents. Nothing is by luck or fortune. All is brought to us except our response.
If that’s so, then me feeling drawn to stillness and silence can’t be an accident either.
I surmise that, as a lightworker and a journalist, I’m being asked to live a life that’s as much into unfoldment as possible while still staying alert and alive to the outside world. I’ll be that’s what I’m supposed to be doing.
I suppose I’ll stay in the middle therefore on this as well as most other things: As much unfoldment as my service contract allows and the rest full out on getting the message out there.
Footnotes
(1) “Jesus Sananda on Unconditional Love,” March 28, 2015 (2003), at http://goldenageofgaia.com/2015/03/28/jesus-sananda-on-unconditional-love/.
(2) Saul, July 22, 2009, at http://johnsmallman.wordpress.com.
(3) “[The] longing for liberation is the will to be free from the fetters forged by ignorance — beginning with the ego-sense and so on, down to the physical body itself — through the realization of one’s true nature.” (Shankara in Swami Prabhavananda and Christopher lsherwood, Shankara’s Crest-Jewel of Discrimination. Hollywood: Vedanta Press, 1975; c1947, 36.)
(4) Divine Mother: Let me be very clear…. If you had seen the light as it actually is – yes, a million, billion suns – you would have simply departed. … We don’t mean die but you would have departed the life that you have designed – yes, with us – for yourself, for the service you are providing – you would have departed and simply said, ‘I do not need to do this. I will just simply sit in the bliss of love and good luck, everybody!’ (Divine Mother in a personal reading with Steve Beckow through Linda Dillon, Oct. 26, 2018.)