Beyond the Constructed Self | Steve Beckow

By Steve Beckow, February 3, 2021

(Golden Age of Gaia)

When one’s grand motif is “you can’t trust anyone,” and one eternally assumes a defensive posture (what my wife called my “scared wolf” look), the ramifications ripple down through one’s personality.

The personality becomes seen as the constructed self it is. And the various components of its construction become visible, one by one.

Constant Comment, vasanas, habitual responses, mind splits (cognitive dissonance) – one at a time these activities of the mind that result in a constructed self are laid bare.

I’m not there yet, but I anticipate that the constructed self will become so visible at some point and so known to me that I may be able to step aside from it entirely and no longer need it. That’s the consummation I’m aiming for.

I say this as a result of watching myself respond to news of a possible dissolution of the Chinese Communist Party a la the USSR. Such an engine of corruption cannot go with us into the New Age, I firmly believe. It’s just a matter of how and when it ends.

But contemplating such a major event put me into overdrive. Oh my, big things may be happening in my world. And what am I doing about it?

And all manner of vasanas went off. I noticed that they were all defensive. Of course I know why and so does anyone who’s been reading these reports for any length of time. (1)

But I “got” my defensiveness (a “get” is a minor realization; see footnote 2). I “got” it at a deeper level than I have before. Getting it is what’s important. And seeing all the vasanas come up, upon considering the news and its implications, had me next see (or be inspired to see) where it was all headed.

It all led back to my grand motif – “you can’t trust anyone” – which results in a constructed self which is primarily defensive.

First, step outside the constructed self into the Self, I tell myself. Then outside the Self into the No-Self, the ascended Self, with Sahaja Samadhi. That’s my plan. The destruction of what Bernadette Roberts calls “the ridgepole.” (3)

If I succeed, dollars to donuts my experience and realization will be truncated (4) because I need to remain able to serve. But the desire to solve the ultimate puzzle persists nonetheless.

There’s nothing stronger or more durable, I’m told, than the longing for liberation. (5) Even though we need to serve.

Footnotes

(1) There was violence in my family.

(2) “Getting” something means seeing the thing in question, recognizing its nature, and understanding the situation in question but without being attended by a flood bliss. I call this a minor realization.

(3) The Self is achieved at Brahmajnana, seventh-chakra enlightenment. Ascension goes beyond Brahmajnana and occurs when the heart fully and permanently opens in Sahaja Samadhi.

What Bernadette Roberts describes as the destruction of the ridgepole very well may be Sahaja Samadhi, the exit from the Third Dimension:

“Unfortunately what most Buddhist authors define as the no-self experience is actually the no-ego experience. The cessation of clinging, desire, the passions, etc., and the ensuing state of imperturbable peace and joy articulates the egoless state of oneness; it does not, however, articulate the no-self experience or the dimension beyond. …

“Four years later, however, I came across two lines attributed to Buddha describing his enlightenment experience. Referring to self as a house, he said, ‘All the rafters are broken now, the ridgepole is destroyed.’ And there it was — the disappearance of the center, the ridgepole; without it, there can be no house, no self.

“When I read these lines, it was as if an arrow launched at the beginning of time had suddenly hit a bull’s-eye. It was a remarkable find. These lines are not a piece of philosophy, but an experiential account, and without the experiential account we really have nothing to go on. In the same verse he says, ‘Again a house thou shalt not build,’ clearly distinguishing this experience from the falling away of the ego-center, after which a new, transformed self is built around a ‘true center,’ a sturdy, balanced ridgepole.” (Bernadette Roberts in “The Path to No-Self” in Stephan Bodian, ed. Timeless Visions, Healing Voices. Freedom, CA: Crossing Press, 1991, 137.)

(4) The most probable circumstance being that it’ll lack bliss, vital to elevate us to a region where the truth becomes obvious. That would be a major realization.

(5) See 
“The Longing for Liberation,” August 20, 2010, at https://goldenageofgaia.com/2010/08/20/the-longing-for-liberation/