Ego Defenses | Ivo of Vega via Sharon Stewart

August 17, 2020

We use ego defenses to avoid anxiety or guilty feelings, however in doing this we also avoid spiritual progress because becoming more spiritual is about soul connection, not pandering to one's ego. The soul knows who you are because it is you, and the soul also knows what your life's purpose is. In order to find out your life's purpose you have to work on eliminating your shadow, the negative part of your ego.

However, there will be defenses in the way in order to stop you from achieving this. These are:

Denial: Thinking others are always wrong and you're always right. This is a bad one. Just read Facebook comments to see that everyone is right who comments on these things. Everyone is actually learning, including you.

Denial: Oh, they can't be talking about me. They're talking about everyone else. I don't do that.

Then there is being "terminally special" as it was referred to in the 12 steps. Everything applies to everyone else, except me. I don't have to mind or change my way of doing things, because everyone loves me the way I am and I can do whatever I like. This is blatant entitlement and egotism at its worst. You're always the exception and can never do any wrong. You always mean well and so everyone will love you even when you violate their boundaries constantly. Life if about listening to others' boundaries, not ignoring them. Cooperation comes from working with others, not by dominating them. Domination only gets doors slammed in your face, if not now than eventually later.

Minimization: I only did it once twenty years ago. I only do that a little bit. I did it but it's not so bad - nobody got hurt.

Repression: Keeping unwanted thoughts from becoming conscious. Many people use addictive behaviors in order to help with this repression. For example, when starting to feel anxious, taking a drink or lighting a cigarette. The chemicals in cigarettes are not only unhealthy, they anesthetize your brain to feel good. People think that they need addictive substances to cope, not realizing that in indulging in them leaves them going into withdrawal as soon as their effect is done. So they then reach out for another hit in the form of more sugar, another cigarette or another drink, in order to alter their frequency. Quitting the habit will raise your frequency but it will also release all the toxic blocks in your system you've allowed to build up.

Using any chemical to mood alter stifles your true nature from being expressed on earth.

Also recovering from addictive behaviours does not remove all negative feelings, however the time you spend indulging in bad moods reduces.

Projection: Projecting leads to attacking others, by the way. You attack someone who reminds you of yourself in some way. I often get it for allowing myself to be vulnerable in public, which you're well aware of if you've watched any of mine and Ivo's videos, and I think it bothers people that I leave myself so open. So they attack me because obviously they don't like being reminded of their own vulnerability. I don't really believe that people are nasty without some kind of reason. There are demonics on this planet, yes, and they'd be the exception. It's their nature to be nasty. But for a human, they have to have suffered some kind of pain, and projection is about repressing it and attacking anyone who reminds you of it. On that note, I say thank you for the hate mail I received after sending out my newsletter on the weekend: it shows me I'm on the right path.

It's good to watch whenever you feel like launching out and attacking another person because you might harbor the same pain they have only you're repressing yours.

Displacement: My parents were great at this, particularly my mother. My parents never fought, but they took all their feelings about each other out on us kids. That's displacement. We bore the brunt of the relationship they refused to work through. They never spoke to each other but they vented their dissatisfaction of each other out on me and my siblings.

We used to call it "anger coming out sideways" when I was in the 12 steps. Instead of getting mad at the person who you're angry at, you get mad at someone who is "safer" to be angry at, who there are fewer consequences FOR YOU if you lash out at them. This obviously does not take the vulnerable nature of a child into consideration at all - it only considers your own situation. I know my father used to get pissed off at his job but instead of being angry there, he came home and took it out on us. This sends a message to children, by the way: "We have to support our parents' unhealthy behaviour because if they didn't have to support us, they wouldn't have to suffer their job. So it's my fault and my responsibility to bear the pain."

This dysfunctional thinking will find that child growing up and allowing itself to be abused and then somehow feeling like they deserve it. That's why people stay in abusive relationships: they are used to being the whipping boy, the scapegoat for everything that goes wrong. So they seek out people with a lot of difficulties in life and try to "help" them in order to reduce the amount of guilt, fear and shame they themselves feel from childhood. They believe if they can help this person and change them into someone better than that heals them from the pain their parents dumped on them. It doesn't. The way to heal the pain is to stop believing in this false way of thinking. "We are guilty for everything." "My parents' and/or partner's emotions are my job to fix." This is highly codependent thinking - putting the needs of abusive others before your own. Strangely, this penchant to allow abuse will continue until you finally see reason and start putting yourself first and setting boundaries with abusive dysfunctional people. I needed the intervention of a 12 step program to do it.

Regression: Happens when triggered. I've dealt with so many people who are dealing with me like I'm their mother or someone they still have issues with. This means you're not living in the moment, you're back in the past and the person you're dealing with is helping you to resolve your past issues with someone else. It's important to look at who this person reminds you of, and usually it's not hard to guess. For example, you're mad at someone because they ridiculed you. For me, that'd be an easy one: it's my father who did this all the time to me when I was child. Healing that wound means to allow yourself to grieve the pain he caused, and the errant thinking you adopted as a result of his behaviour, such as thinking, "I'm not good enough." Being ridiculed by your own parents is a horrible start to life and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, but I experienced it and you can heal from it, thus helping you in relationships with others. However, I find that instead of tolerating people laughing at you, you might want to consider whether you actually want to even know this person, seeing as they have so much baggage they're projecting at you.

Also, after a while, a partner may become annoyed at always being seen as the errant mother or father you had. Your inability to live in the now may annoy them, and they may become tired of your relating to them as a parent. Unless they have the same types of issues, then you will simply recreate your parents' marriage. Or they may lovingly try to help you through your old triggers so that you can someday relate to them in a personal way that reflects your union as two autonomous people. In that case, you have a gem. Hold on to them. Anyone who supports you going through hard work is a treasure.

My sister is doing this to me now: she is seeing me as my father who wore the crazy label in my family, and she is my mother who was always perfect, and apparently never made mistakes (of course because someone else always bore the responsibility for what she did.) My sister refuses to understand the process of ascension and healing I've been through because she hasn't gone through it herself, she doesn't have that model to understand - she still understands the old medical model of dysfunctionality, depression and anxiety, and thirdly it suits her ego to see herself as the strong one and me as the weak, broken soul. Until she has to do all the work taking care of infirm family members, then she gets upset about it.

Sublimation: This is also a shifting of emotions. Maybe you have a stressful job but instead of flying off the handle, you have to keep a lid on your emotions and keep smiling to earn your paycheck. So instead you play sports on the weekend and you can let your aggressions out there. This is sublimation. It's sad that people have to do this instead of having jobs that they can speak their mind at or better yet, not have any issues with.

I believe which defenses you use depend on what you're feeling. If it's guilty, you'd tend to minimize or use denial. If it's horrible shame, you'd tend to use repression or projection as a defense, not wanting to experience any part of that pain at all because the wound is so deep and so hurtful. If you're using displacement, you are completely in denial and there are some huge truths you're not addressing and this is how you compensate. However, other people CAN see them and it can drive them crazy when your displacement is affecting them negatively. I was in this situation as a child always being scapegoated for the hate my parents harbored for each other.

I'm putting this up as a reminder of the spiritual lessons that Ivo and I are committed to producing. We've been doing a lot of channelings on the Storm, seeing as it affects everyone and frankly, it can be interesting as well. People have to realize when all is said and done and the cabal are kicked off this planet and their influence completely negated, earth will then be in a very positive growth incline. Ivo, can you continue with this please?

Ivo: Certainly, my love, earth will have pulled out all the restraints that make its present day lack of growth, be it spiritual or infrastructural growth, impossible. Your people should have been much further ahead after a cycle of 26,000 years, however because the dark ones overtook your planet, your growth was largely created strictly to suit the needs of the deep state, not your needs. You are led to believe that automobiles are there for your convenience yet when you compare this to E.T. worlds where bi-location, time travel and then flight through space is done, you are very far behind us. Your insistence on utilizing oil as the grease and fuel of your system does not help you as you have to breathe in pollutants, which make you ill. Also your use of cell phones or telephones does not help you because you are telepathic beings. So I say that all the so-called progress you have made throughout your industrial age was not progress at all, it led to the retardation of your latent sensory skillset. This of course, is cabal planned and part of their control over your spiritual development.

Me: Yes. And that suits the cabal - move them off into technology as a control mechanism, not technology as an assistance mechanism, like the E.T.s use it. Your people use computers but you still can multi-task using your own minds and telepathy is normal. Physical speech using the mouth is slow and never practised.

Ivo: Exactly. So beware, people, because when the Storm is over and your world has eliminated the deep state, spiritual work will be done because that is the normal state of the human being. There will be safeguards put into place to ensure that aggression against others can no longer be practised. Therefore discussion will become the way to settle disagreements. Also there will be a light bulb moment at the end of the riddance of the deep state and all dark ones upon your planet as you realize that what is left on your planet is all one people - it will be a state of unity thinking at last. Because of course, as some know are others are learning now, division is the plan of the Deep State. It is a false state perpetrated upon you in your ignorance.

Me: That'll take a while.

Ivo: It could, my love. However, more and more of you are on board with this.

Me: I sure am. You fire a shot at me and you hurt me. Don't think I don't know we're all one, I sure do. When you hurt, I hurt. When you're in pain and decide to share it by attacking me, I end up in pain. There's no way to switch it off. I've tried. I've healed from parental issues and I still end up in pain when people attack me. People say it's because I have the same issue; it's not. It's because they steal my energy and give me a whopping dose of their pain in exchange. So with that, please note that your email will not get read if you reply to my newsletter. If I seem incommunicado, this is why. You don't get over chronic fatigue by taking on more of others' pain.

Ivo: The empath will always know it first. You are a highly conscious being of unity consciousness. You understand that others' pain is your pain. Eventually all people on earth will rise in vibration enough that they too will begin to understand this and they will stop hurting others.

Me: Well, they're not there yet.

Ivo: Of course they are not. That is why there is intervention. And that is why you are here to complain about it - to impress this message upon others. When you hurt others, it is because you are hurting. When you do your work and heal, you stop hurting others. The empathic indigo absorbs others' energies and is there to transmute them back into positive energy.

Me: Right.

Ivo: Understand the Storm itself is now seeking to unify people by their groups: countries will unite, all Americans will become one people. There are many still voting for the dark ones and eventually their light will snap on as well. If not, they leave the planet and reincarnate elsewhere. Many bloodlines will also lose ground as those capable of evolutionary progress take dominance on the planet. Humanity on earth will evolve now.

Me: They say there's nothing like a common enemy to unify people.

Ivo: Yes. Change is part of the ascension process. Change is the normal human condition, not stagnation and not repeating time loops as has been the case in the lives of the earthlings. Advancement of mind, and in that same vein, advancement of the physical circumstances always goes with it.

Me: Thanks Ivo.

Ivo: My love, avoiding pain is difficult on your planet, even though you are set up to attract it. Work on your transmutation skills.

Me: I know. Ivo, I have so much to work on right now. I could use some help. If I was healthier I could get all the things done that I need to do in a day. I've eliminated as much as I can and destressed my life to the greatest extent possible, even moved to get away from the last place I lived in and found a more suitable place. I can only do so much in a day and more than half of it is spent sleeping.

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