Friday, April 29, 2022

Jokes | Don Spectacularis




Most spiritual forums and websites out there have just gotten way too damn serious lately, no? And yet, the real secret to enlightenment lies NOT in being all serious and sullen and morose 24x7x366; but instead, in finding fun, where there ain't even none! So allow me to pull out some puns (instead of guns), and once again remind one and all of one of the best kept secrets of the ancients. That one big secret sauce that separates the wheat from the chaff, the wise from the wicked, the enlightened from the entitled, the sage from the stooge, and the master from the b@$tard. (I had to make it all rhyme somehow, okay?)

It's the secret sauce to life's joys that doesn't necessarily come prepackaged inside a fancy-ass Buddha-shaped bottle. The secret sauce that is popularly known as having a sense of humour. Also best known as man's seventh sense, if you will.

The very (innate) ability to laugh off things, even in the very hardest and darkest (and most challenging of) times.

Also known as the way of the MASTERS.

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So anyways, that intro doesn't seem to have worked all too well in here. So then, here's some fun new jokes to get things rolling (on the floor laughing) instead!

Enjoy! ;)

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Jesus H. Christ walks into a bar.

"For the LAST TIME sir," fumes the raging bartender, "we DO NOT serve WATER in here!!!"

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Three Arcturians walk into a bar.

The bartender takes one quick look at them all, and then asks...

"'Sup fellas? Why the long face?"

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Three Sirians walk into that exact same bar shortly thereafter.

This time round however, the bartender doesn't say even as much as a single word to them.

Rather confused at this (rather discriminatory) treatment, the Sirians ask,"Greatly sorry to bother you, sir, but, where's the punch-line?"

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Donald John Trump walks into a bar (filled to the brim with US politicos).

He takes one look around the place, and cries out loud...

"God. Why is it always me having to raise the bar with these idiots?"

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DJT walks into a pole.

Pulling himself right back up, he thunders, "SEE? I TOLD YA'LL these damn POLES were RIGGED!"

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Joseph Robinette Biden Junior walks into a pole.

(This is not a joke. Dementia is nothing to laugh about.)

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Elon Musk walks into a poll.

YES: 69%

NO: 42.0%

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Q walks into a /pol/

Every last MSM news outlet on Planet Earth has something nasty to say about it in less than 17 minutes.

(Where We Go Pun, We Go Lol.)

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P.S. A whole bus full of dream interpreters fell into a river the other day...

...I'd always known symbolism will be their downfall.

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- Don Spectacularis (Originals!)
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